Hot Girl Health

The imaginary doom clock is what I call the made up timer we, especially women (especially my Hot Girls),  put our lives on.  If you’ve ever heard someone prematurely age themselves, where they label themselves as a dinosaur or a relic for not knowing a slang word, beating themselves up for not crossing off the giant checklist of their life, or being out of touch with themselves and projecting those issues, it’s because they hear their imaginary doom clock ticking, as if life ends after 29 and where you are is always where you’ll be.  I’ve seen people as young as 23-27 acting like they’ve begun to fossilize.  Can you imagine feeling washed up and dated at 23?  Your brain isn’t even fully developed yet.  And the craziest part is that it’s all made up!  It’s all injected into our heads, put there and made to be real.  

One of my very first articles, The Fountain of Youth, was named not because it’s about staying young forever, but more so how to help ease into aging, because it happens to us all as long as we are alive. And youth is so much more than looking young, there’s a mental aspect involved as well.  If you tell yourself “I’m old” “I’m washed up” “things never change” “I live and I die” everyday, it will become your reality, no matter your actual physicality.  The negative mindset will waste your youth away that much faster. Whenever you see a video of a much older person in their 80s+ who exudes “young” energy, it’s not just because they may or may not be walking and moving as such, but because mentally and in spirit, they are timeless and settled, they know this and it exudes outwards into their physical being.  

Societal expectations can speed run you into misery.  The biggest reason people “go with the flow” when it comes to societal milestones (marriage, kids, jobs) and don’t really give much stock into their own personal feelings before going out to do those things is because it’s either what they are taught or know, or because it’s expected of them and believe that it will bring them happiness.  And for some people, it does work and happily ever after.  But what if it doesn’t for you?  Do you have to force it or pretend? Societal expectations are based so heavily on comparison even though everyone’s lives are so different.  Whether you follow the status quo or not, comparing yourself to others will make you miserable in itself.  There’s no prize for rushing to do something everyone else is doing (that you know) other than being able to say you did it.  And just because someone else looks happy in their choices, unless you’re them, you don’t really know that.

A preplanned timeline is imaginary because you can’t predict the future.  No one can.  Straight to the point, things happen.  And you don’t really know the magnitude of what that means until it happens to you.  Once there’s a health scare, a heartbreak, an unexpected event, life can change all at once.  This isn’t to scare anybody, it’s only to show that there’s no point in thinking you can map out your entire life until you’re at the bridge you need to cross.  You can prepare, but you can’t predict.  Life is a marathon, not a destination, it’s always going and twisting and subverting your expectations. Lived experience is completely different than an assumed blueprint.  And this isn’t said to be negative or hopeless.  The good thing about lived experience is that you gain wherewithal.  The more you know yourself and have experienced things, the more direction and clarity you gain to know what you really do want and need in this life. It’s okay if those things evolve as you do.

And if you know or feel you are meant for more or different, that’s okay.  Maybe it’s even time for a change, but you feel that it’s frowned upon. “But AK, I’m too old now, I have to keep going, I’m stuck, I can’t”, which brings me to my next point….

If you feel unhappy now, staying where you are will just make it worse.  Let’s say you’ve come to the conclusion that you don’t want to keep going on the timeline you’re on, but you’re too scared to get off.   A major cause of depression is stagnancy, feeling like you’re stuck in life and it’s passing you by or you haven’t improved.  I think a lot of people feel this way at one point or another, but the first shift to escape has to be pivoting your mindset.  First, being self aware enough to think “I’m not happy, I need a change” is a great start.  Gaining courage is the second.  If you feel that you’ve wasted 10 years of your life on xyz, why waste another 10?  This is why I don’t believe in dooming yourself by saying “I’m too old” to want better.  What you’re really saying is that you’re scared of leaving a comfort zone. Because if you’re not gone off this Earth yet, then it’s not too late.  Sometimes people prefer to stay miserable because it’s more comfortable than to attempt to be happy because they that would require change and adapting.  And the doom clock is the perfect excuse because everyone can relate to the fears of aging.  But the entire point of this article is to let you know that you can change YOUR life, at the drop of a hat because your cages are often imaginary.  And yes you might not be able to physically or financially leave your current circumstance, but shifting your intent to have a different life is a signal to the universe that you will exist differently. Eventually the external reality will catch up.

Someone feeling stuck because of self imposed limits is something I hate to see.  You don’t even realize how easy it is to put yourself into a mental cage and then be trapped there until time has passed and you’re viewing your life through hindsight.  If I could get one message across in this article it’s that you can be successful at any age (even past your fantasized 20s) and if you want positive change, it can happen for you. Don’t be burdened by what other people are doing or saying, orbit your own world, and know that the timeline is created and shifted by you.

If you relate, leave a comment about what you wished you would have told yourself sooner (be nice to yourself).

Thank you for reading!!!!